So as some of you may be aware from my previous Blogs, my Mother unfortunately has terminal cancer. She hasn’t got long left. it is because of this that I have started to rethink how I want the rest of my life to be and do the things that bring me and those around me the most pleasure. Facing the death of someone so close to you really puts things into perspective and makes you confront the things in your life that once seemed important but now seem meaningless. I guess I am attempting to streamline my life, trying to cram as much happiness and contentment in with my job, friends, family and experiences as possible. Life appears now so fleeting when once it stretched out before me, the end never in sight, much like how the Summer holidays seemed as a child.
Now life seems urgent, too precious to waste. Adventures too important to pass by. The hug that used to feel obligatory now feels necessity. The weekly phone call, which once felt strained, now feels like a life-line. The semi-forced family Christmases, which used to feel like a chore, now feel like meetings with the utmost poignancy.
so with this emerging feeling of not letting life pass me by, I want to able to feel freer to perform, to do the thing that makes me feel the most terrified I can possibly feel. Sing. I have always loved to sing but I have also always struggle to stand up and perform or to put my talent out there, to show people my voice, but if I don’t conquer this fear now, while I have the chance, I fear that I never will. Below you will see some footage of me singing. I cannot describe to you how excruciatingly scary it is to put these out there, yet here I go, making myself vulnerable to the public. I hope you enjoy them.